Thursday, April 11, 2013

Oh so funny...

Anyone else run out of blog titles? I think the majority of my blogs are one of these categories: Holiday's/Special Events, Jobs/School, Me Venting, Me trying to get fit and lose weight. Yup pretty much sums up my blog. So this is going to be such a rambling post but I need to get it off my chest feel free to read it or not honestly I won't know if you do unless you leave a comment and even then you could just be commenting after skimming and not really reading. Anywhoo...if you can't tell I'm on one tonight. This has been one hell of a week. (Sorry if I offend any of you readers but Ben served his mission in England and hell isn't a swear word and we've adapted that concept into our home). So lets back up a little bit and I'll try and keep it as short and simple as possible around February I went to the doctor and had her give me anxiety/depression tests. I had been talking with my EAP counselor about this for a while and one day I was having a really bad day and I was like I NEED to go see if I can get some more help. So they put me on Lexapro... I had no idea what to expect and was kind of worried in all honesty... I'm happy to say it was amazing. My life literally changed it was crazy. I feel sad sometimes to know that I didn't go earlier and get this taken care of. I know everyone has there own opinions about medications and all that but your brain is just like your leg or your arm if its broke you need to fix it and that sometimes that involves medication. Since then I've changed to Celexa because its a ton cheaper. At first I wasn't really sure if anything had changed like if I was just hoping it had. I went back for my follow up with the doctor a few weeks later and I took the same anxiety/depression tests again and we compared them... NIGHT AND DAY difference I kid you not! Ok so anyways since then my life hasn't felt as rollercoastery (yes thats a word) since then and its been great. So with that background... Monday I wake up and mother nature has came to visit and I'm onrier than crap I don't want to get out of bed I'm ticked I'm tired. Mind you Ben has been working the late night shift the past few weeks so that hasn't helped my mood either. I know I should be grateful I get to see him once a day at least but still its rough.  So I call in late to work and sleep till 1015am. Oh yeah and last week I worked out 4 days in a row an hour each day. This week nothing! Sorry if I'm all over in this post its more of a get it off my chest than a making sense kind of post.  So anyway its just been a long week I've been tired and onry and feeling overwhelmed with school. My parents are in the Bahamas this week they have been going once a week during this time of year for the past few years. They have a place to stay with some friends and they fly for free so its a pretty good set up. Well my mom is her parents only living child and they have lots of different health issues so when they are gone Morgan(my sis) and I take over for my mom and dad. Well my grandma fell yesterday morning. She has alzeiheimers and Morgan and Spencer (her husband) went and helped her. Well today the home health nurse calls me at work and says I need to take grandma to the doctor ASAP! because her toe is swollen and bruised. She also has diabetes and there can be a lot of problems with their feet. So Morgan and I rush home from work take grandma to the doctor and they took x-rays she broke her toe,a piece of the bone chipped off and sprained her ankle. Oh gosh makes me feel so bad! On top of all this its my own damn fault because I'm a procrastnator and in all serious might have ADHD (I'm acutally going to make an appt to go see someone about that) (and its kind of funny because reading this post you can tell its hard for me to stay on track.) I have a chemistry test in the morning an assignment that was due last night, a biology report due on saturday and a biology test on monday. The one smart thing I did do was request this coming Monday off. I requested it yesterday because I started to feel overwhelmed. There is my story and I'm sticking to it. Pray, send good vibes that my head will not explode in the next few days cause it kind of feels like it.

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